Desperation is bad. Like real bad. I’ll tell you why. When you get desperate, and this applies for everything not just with girls, people can smell it on you from a mile away. No one likes desperate people. There is just something about them that is ungodly unattractive. When you become desperate your behavior begins to change. You start to push too hard. You become bitter and frustrated very easily. It’s not fun. I remember a time when I was on a really bad dry spell of no sex. It was 3 years long. It sucked. More than just for the fact that I wasn’t getting laid. It sucked because it made me question everything about myself. It made me wonder if I was just the ugliest guy around. Maybe I was just clueless. Maybe I am just doomed to never get laid again. All these thoughts sound crazy now. At the time it sounded perfectly reasonable. The negative thoughts then feed off you and make you feel worse, making you even more desperate. Then the spiral continues.
To my knowledge there isn’t really a how to on getting out of a spiral of desperation. The best tip I can give is if you feel yourself hit a really low level and you know you are starting to get desperate is to back off of whatever you are feeling desperate for. So if for example you haven’t had sex or a date in years, just back off of it entirely. Put all your focus on you. Don’t worry about approaching, don’t worry about any of that. Just get yourself right. Get yourself to the point where you are at peace with your situation. Then you can take the steps to get out of your funk. The other big tip I can give is to just remember that everyone goes through slumps. No one is perfect. Most people at some point have been there so don’t get too discouraged or feel like you are a failure at life. You aren’t. You are just stuck in a bad spot, and the good news is you can always get unstuck. I am proof positive of that. The truth is the best way to get out of desperation is to avoid it in the first place, and for that I do have another big tip that can help which we will talk about next chapter.